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Guest Opinion: Teens should stay away from alcohol

You’re lying facedown on the floor, your head is pounding and you feel like you’re being turned inside and out. You don’t know why, but you have no recollection whatsoever of the night before, and every time you try to remember it feels like someone is whacking your head with a two ton hammer.

So, obviously, the first question you’ll ask yourself is: “What happened last night?” Stereotypical and movie-esque as it might sound, that’s honestly the first question usually. Well, unless the situation was worse (and let’s hope its not) and the first question will be “What happened to my clothes?”

You’re drunk.

Alcohol is not something to be handled lightly. If you didn’t die from the alcohol poisoning, chances are something else might’ve happened that will make you wish you were dead. Maybe someone took a video of you being raped and posted it all over YouTube. Alcohol, when not consumed responsibly, will impair your judgment and exaggerate your emotions. Don’t be fooled by all of the songs that glorify alcohol.

Sure, a glass of wine is alright, but not when you’re under 21. Did you know there’s a reason 21 is the legal drinking age? The people who made the law didn’t just pull a random number out of their hats. It has been scientifically proven that the brain finishes developing at the age of 21. So, if getting caught by the police isn’t enough to stop you, just think about how much damage you could do to your brain if you decide to binge drink at 16, 17, or 18.

There’s also the tiniest of things that can kill you when you’re drunk. When you’re drunk, you lose control of your muscles. So, let’s say you get a wave of nausea in your stomach and you think “Oh, I’m going to throw up!” So, you pull yourself up off the floor with great difficulty and start stumbling (literally, stumbling) toward the bathroom. You finally stand in front of the toilet, swaying from side to side, and your legs suddenly have no way of supporting your body and you fall, your head smacking into the cool, hard porcelain of the toilet seat. Bam. Dead.

Now, let’s say you’re too drunk to get up from the floor and go to the bathroom. But you really need to throw up and you’re lying on your back. You can’t stop the wave of bile from creeping up your throat, and as you start throwing up, you’ll choke on your own vomit. Bam. Dead.

You drink too much, and suddenly the floor looks so soft and comfortable, and you lie down and goodness you could stay there forever, and you lose consciousness as your body shuts down. Bam. Dead.

You get behind the wheel, desperate to get home. Crash into another car, hit a building, drive off a bridge. Bam. Dead.

There is nothing attractive or “cool” about getting drunk. It’s a mess.

And let’s not forget about the horrible hangover you will be enduring the next day. Every single tiny sound will be painfully loud, the sunlight will hurt your eyes, and your head will hurt worse than you could ever imagine.

If you’re at a party, and you drink too much, please, please don’t think it’s a good idea to get behind the wheel and drive yourself home. Call your parents. Admit that you’ve been drinking and you need a sober driver, and they’ll be there in a heartbeat. Yes, they will be furious and there’s the high chance you’ll be grounded until you’re thirty. But they will be so so grateful you did the right thing.

All in all, being drunk sucks. Underage drinking is dangerous, stupid, risky, dumb, (puts away thesaurus) I think you get it.

So, I can’t follow you home and make sure you stay out of the alcohol, but I hope you guys make the right choice and stay sober. It’s not worth it.

Re-printed with permission from Montesano High School’s online newspaper at Lizzie is 16 years old and lives in Montesano.